"Champions eat feedback for breakfast" Yes or No?

The Two Faces of Pride: A Journey of Self-Realization

There’s a feeling of grandeur that comes when you achieve your dreams: a sense of extreme importance, of having risen above, of being overqualified, overexposed, and indispensable. It’s the thrill of having an opinion in every conversation, of providing solutions to every dilemma. You revel in the adulation of your fans, and life feels like an unending celebration.

Pride is an intoxicating feeling. You punch the air with satisfaction and dance your way to the bank, the pub, the hotel, the boardroom, the platform, even the throne. Life feels good—no, better than good—it feels great. The rush is contagious, and everyone wants a taste. If I could bottle this feeling and sell it, it would be worth more than Bitcoin.

But then, what happens when it all goes south? When you become a nonentity, dispensable, criticized, and ignored? When your opinion no longer matters, the boardroom doors are closed in your face, creditors are at your door, and the bank is foreclosing on your debt? When the papers expose your deepest secrets, no one answers your calls, and the mob turns against you? Life feels bad, no, worse—it feels dead.

These are two polarities, and somewhere in between lies the reality for most of us. You’re either heading toward the top or sliding toward the bottom. It’s pride that determines the choices you make. For some, they’ll do anything to stay at the “life is good” place. For others, they might even consider taking their own lives to avoid reaching the “life is bad” place.

What Is Pride?

Pride can be described in many ways. At its core, it’s the feeling of superiority, of being better than others. There’s the healthy kind of pride—the satisfaction you feel when achieving a goal. This is a natural and necessary response to accomplishment. Without it, we wouldn’t be motivated to push ourselves to new heights, whether creating the desktop computer or developing the World Wide Web.

Then there’s the darker side of pride, the one that’s difficult to recognize and is ultimately destructive. This is the pride that harbors hatred for others based on race, religion, or ideology—the pride that compels you to do whatever it takes to preserve your status quo. This kind of pride reveals itself only when it is threatened.

Consider times in history, such as during the American race divide or apartheid in South Africa. When a person of color sat in a “whites-only” area, seemingly calm, god-fearing individuals would suddenly be consumed with anger. The moment their pride was violated, the switch would flip, and violence would ensue. In those moments, the perpetrators often acted in ways they never thought possible.

The Destructive Side of Pride

Pride becomes destructive when we feel overlooked, disrespected, or when our hard work goes unrecognized. It surfaces when we believe our ideas are ignored, when others take credit for what we’ve done, or when we think our intelligence, beliefs, or identity are being questioned. Anger, often seen as a fruit of pride, is rooted in fear—fear of being belittled, ignored, or disrespected.

Some people, in an effort to protect their pride, surround themselves only with those who celebrate them, avoiding criticism at all costs. This only feeds the ego, but it’s not the celebrants who propel us forward. Successful individuals often say their critics, not their admirers, motivate them to achieve their greatest feats. As Clinton Swayne wisely puts it, “Champions eat feedback for breakfast.”

Pride, as the saying goes, comes before a fall. Anyone who cannot accept criticism or rejection will never achieve greatness. Critics are, in fact, teachers—magicians who have the ability to bring out the best in us, even when we don’t see it ourselves. If we refuse to swallow our pride, we are headed for disaster.

Political Leaders: Masters of Criticism

I admire political leaders for one reason: they’ve learned how to deal with criticism. Day in and day out, they are ridiculed and criticized, rarely praised. But they persist in their roles. Whether they are skilled at their jobs or not is secondary—what matters is their ability to withstand constant judgment. Many of them have their own personal issues, but when it comes to enduring criticism, they are more than conquerors. If every person could conquer the intense rage that builds up when they aren’t taken seriously, we’d all live with less stress and greater peace. Whether we are a co-worker, a spouse, a parent, a leader, or a teacher—if we learn to embrace criticism instead of being consumed by pride, we’d all be healthier and happier.

A Personal Journey

I find this path difficult to walk, but I’ve decided to take it one step at a time. I now recognize pride for what it is: a hindrance to relationships, a barrier to growth, and a destroyer of achievement. I’ve chosen to “eat feedback for breakfast.” What do I have to lose except feelings of resentment and rage?

I will say "please" and "thank you" even when I feel like punching the wall. I will let another driver go ahead, even if I’m in a hurry. I will allow someone else to take the accolades, even if I did the work. Does this mean I’m internalizing my emotions? No. I’ll have a good old chat with myself and view every setback as a chance to build my character. As the wise ones say, “You attract what you need for your enlightenment.”

Pride, in all its forms, is my greatest hindrance to freedom. So, even though it’s uncomfortable, I will accept (more like kicking and screaming) what comes my way, knowing that it will strip me of pride and propel me toward grace and serenity. One day, I will smile with pride—I mean the good kind. Ha!